Last week I got a call from a friend. It went something like this:
**'I quit my job at XYZ. Can you call the ambassador and meet with him tomorrow? I want to work at the US embassy and I need to see if he has any positions for me.' (friend)
**'Can you give me directions to the embassy?' (me)
**'Why?' (friend)
**'Well, I don't know where it is. I also don't know the ambassador. I just don't think that, even if I can find the embassy, he will meet with me to see if you can have a job. I also am pretty sure that we don't even have an ambassador or any American staff at the embassy.' (me)
**'oh...well I don't know where it is.' (friend)
**'Then I'm not really sure how I can help you. Sorry.' (me)
I guess since I'm one of the 'lucky ones' in this whole nationality lottery that means that I know anyone and everyone from the US...and I know them well enough to just call them up and get a job for a local friend that I actually really don't know all that well and I don't know how he got my phone number.
This is actually a common thing. People asking me to go talk to the UN to find them a job or to get them refugee status because they want to go to America, even if they're not a refugee. I don't work at the UN and I don't know anyone who does, but because I'm white I must have connections for this sort of thing, right?
What I really like is when people start asking me about foreign policy and why I don't make sure it is changed. They ask things like 'can you please tell George Bush that we really don't think we need sanctions?' or 'can you tell George Bush that he should give people from the Sandbox visas to come to America?' My answer is usually 'next time George calls and asks me what I think I will be sure and tell him. And next time Omar calls to ask you what you think can you please tell him that I want this street to become paved?' They don't usually laugh. I don't think they quite understand the correlation between the fact that I'm asking them to do the exact same thing they just asked me to do and it's really that ridiculous.
It's also fun when people hear that I'm from TX. Always, without a doubt, the very next thing out of their mouths is 'oh yes, George Bush is from TX. You know him? You are neighbors?' I always want to say 'yes, he is my best friend. How did you know?!?'
However, in my birthday scrapbook, the one with pictures of my friends and family from home, there just so happens to be a picture of a friend that also has Laura Bush in it. I will have to be really careful not to let my national friends see. Otherwise they will think that I've been lying to them this entire time and I'm not really sure I could convince them otherwise!!!
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1 comment:
I totally get this all the time. Of course I must know every American. I mean, they know every person in their country, right? Insane people. :) I also, consequently, love being called 'English'. I must be British simply because I'm white. And, well, I guess that means I speak English. The fact that I do, well, not every foreigner does. But they don't quite get that. :)
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